really need a punchbag to be honest cant cope
want to self harm but it wont be because of her i always self harm after arguin with her thats not right
what is my problem
why do i care so much?

why what does she give me..arguements, bad moods, scars.. what IS IT

i need 2 sort my fucking life out ditch this bitch and run.

but i wont will i

nope

why dont you, it seems like it is bringing u more harm than good

your right

WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME

Another diet.. another failure probably, got to give it my all

Intake
Banana 126
Apple 80
Fruit bag 53 & cereal bar 99
Spaghetti Bolognese 500 ?
Total: 858

outtake
abs video

usually fuck up in the night i havent woo, thinspo post tomorrowww

hey girls i am desperate ! i have been eating and eating and i need to lose weight bad i will feel so much better and happy if i do. I need this. need to be healthier and exercise tomorrow i can do this !

Anyone got any thinspo sites or motivational posts.. help me !

I need to get back into this ! I have not been into this as much as I used to.. eating right and exercising used to be my life ! What happened but I WILL get back on track. No food what so ever is worth more than the feeling you get when you feel skinnier or look better !

Me & my friend are doing it together, competing against eachother to see how much weight we could lose in two days and just going to keep doing ittt I am so up for this. Need to really eat less

STOP eating when your bored

Im going to do this ! I need this badlyyy I have wanted this for so long about time I did it and felt important for once!

i just feel so sad. Im just thinking about counselling it ends this friday and im scared PETRIFIED actually. scared of getting back to my old ways, self harming, keeping things in.. everythig. butt im going to miss her yes rita she was lovely and actualy a very good counsellor. i think i started to think of her as my friend.. wrong i no but when you are so vunerable and havent spoke to people about how u feel about anything for two years a person you let in becomes someone important. does that make sense? i just finished writing her a letter. because i no on friday i wont be able to tell her anything i want to cause i suck i fukin HATE crying. wtf is wrong with me thick prick. and been arguing with lucia and cant be bothered with her why cant i shake her, say no i dont want to be you friend she fucks my head up.. i think i feel i owe her something for being there for me in my darkest days i dont no. and now im thinking about my nan.. and how much i miss her.

What if i go back into dark depression again I dont think i will come back up from it this time to be honest im weak.

my friend said she thought i was such a strong person to get through it.. i was like are you serious yeh well strong fucked up my arms and everything